Bon Jovi to the EXTREME MAX!!!!!

So this one time, in chemistry class, when I was 16, I was sitting listening to Dr. Phil (I kid you not) talking about reaching an equilibrium in exchange reactions. He was explaining it very well using an everyday example: In our local shopping mall my friend and I were wreaking havoc – I was busy running up the down escalator while she was running down the up escalator and we were constantly high-fiving in the middle to the chagrin of our fellow moving stairs trekkers. And that is how exchange reactions work. I personally don't understand why people think chemistry is that hard. Pfffffffft.

Onto a more engaging note, my other friend, who was too sensible to run the wrong way on an escalator, was telling me about her weekend and how she’d met the hottest guy, like, EVER, and his name was Jon Bon (it wasn’t really, it was something else that sounded like a band name too) to which I cleverly replied: “Ha! Like Bon Jovi?? Hahahahhaaha!” Apparently, I was not the first person to ever think of that joke and I was warned that should fortune smile on me and I ever be so lucky as to meet this Adonis of a man, I was not to mention the similarity of his name to a certain popular music group from the 90s.. ish.. (I’m not an expert on music; it could be from any time! Except I don’t think the 60s or 70s because they don’t play him on Solid Gold) So I promised not to. And whenever I can, and I remember, I try to keep my promises.

So, several years (two to be exact) passed and the weekend was drawing near. The majority of my friends were away for some or other reason, so three of us decided to have an EXTREME to the MAX weekend!!!!! To show everyone we could too have fun without them. We started off our EXTREME to the MAX weekend!!!!! by going to the movies to watch “The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants”. It was a touching film that played our heart strings like harp... strings. It was EXTREME in the way it dealt with various body issues and the concerns of blossoming young women through a magical pair of pants. And it was believable to the MAX because I and my other totally differently shaped friends wear each other’s tight fitting jeans ALL the time (except only on excavation for me, I don’t wear pants otherwise) (except for pyjama pants). Also the little girl wet herself when she fainted. I didn’t know this was possible, I mean it makes sense, but dear God let me never faint and wet myself in a public place.

We then went to the local bottle store and stocked up on two bottles of the finest vodka money totalling $20 can buy and EXTREME drank to the MAX, interspersed with cups of Turkish apple tea, while watching the very first High School Musical followed by Dirty Dancing 2: Havana Nights. After all that EXTREME television and being apple tea-ed to the MAX, we moseyed down rape alley to go to a party. When we got to the party there was not a drop of alcohol to be found, which was fortunate because we were already EXTREMEly sozzled. Then out of the corner of my eye I saw a group of youths sitting on the couch so I elegantly and confidently tripped and wobbled over to introduce myself. A certain dark featured and haired young man smiled at me in a heart-melting way while shaking my hand and introduced himself: “Hi, I’m Jon Bon”. Immediately I stopped, looked at him, cogs were whirring in my brain and things slowly ticking over. Time stopped and there was a kind of glow around him as slowly my thoughts processed...

“You’re not that hot” I replied and stumbled off.

I then somehow found alcohol, drank lots more and ended up with a short trip to hospital, but that is another story. To the MAX EXTREME!!!!!

Also, since seeing him sober, on my part, and topless on his, he is that hot.